• Social Skills

  • Social Skills

    Each week during the school year at KIDS Club/WISE Guys, we select one social skill to focus on with the kids. We use the book Skill Streaming the Elementary School Child: New Strategies and Perspectives for Teaching Prosocial Skills by Ellen McGinnis and Arnold P. Goldstein. Here are some examples of the skills we are building.

    Introducing Yourself

    1. Decide if you want to meet the person.
    2. Decide if it is good time.
    3. Walk up to the person.
    4. Introduce yourself: "Hi! My name is _______."
    5. Wait for the person to tell you his/her name. If they do not, ask them!

    Ignoring Distractions

    1. Count to five. . .or more if needed.
    2. Say to yourself, "I won't look, I will keep _______."
    3. Continue to do what you are supposed to be doing.
    4. Say to yourself, "Good for me, I did it!"

    Listening

    1. Look at the person who is talking.
    2. Sit quietly.
    3. Think about what is being said.
    4. Say yes or nod your head.
    5. Ask a question about the topic to find out more if needed.

    Saying Thank You

    1. Decide if you want to thank someone.
    2. Choose a good time and place.
    3. Thank the person in a friendly way. Make sure and include why you are thanking them!

    Following Instructions

    1. Listen carefully to the instructions.
    2. Ask questions about anything you do not understand.
    3. Repeat the instructions to the person or to yourself.
    4. Follow the instructions.

    Joining In

    1. Decide if you want to join in.
    2. Decide what to say.
    3. Choose a good time.
    4. Say it in a friendly way.

    Deciding on Something to Do

    1. Check to be sure you have finished what you are currently doing, and cleaned up!
    2. Think of the activities you would like to do!
    3. Choose one!
    4. Start the activity!

    Playing a Game

    1. Be sure you know the rules.
    2. Decide who starts the game.
    3. Remember to wait your turn.
    4. When the game is over, say something nice to the other person, and help clean up.

    Sharing

    1. Decide if you want to share something.
    2. Decide on the person with whom you want to share.
    3. Choose a good time and place.
    4. Offer to share in a friendly and sincere way.

    Being a Good Sport

    1. Decide how you and other person played the game.
    2. Think of what you can honestly tell the other person.
      1. Congratulations.
      2. You played a good game.
      3. You are getting a lot better at this game.
    3. Act out your best choice.
    4. Help the other person put things away when done.

    Dealing with Losing

    1. Say to yourself, "Everybody can't win. It's ok that I didn't win this time!"
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Ask to help someone.
      2. Do a different activity you enjoy.
      3. Do a relaxation exercise.
    3. Act our your best choice.

    Saying No

    1. Decide whether or not you want to do what is being asked of you, or if it is even a choice.
    2. Think about why you do not want to do this.
    3. Tell the person "no" in a friendly way.
    4. Give your reason.

    Apologizing

    1. Decide if you need to apologize.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Say it out loud to the person.
      2. Write the person a note.
    3. Choose a good time and place.
    4. Carry out your best choice in a sincere way.

    Accepting No

    1. Decide why you were told no.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Do something else.
      2. Say how you feel in a friendly way.
      3. Write about how you feel.
    3. Act our your best choice.

    Using Self-Control

    1. Stop and count to 10.
    2. Think about how your body feels.
    3. Think about your choices:
      1. Walk away for now.
      2. Do a relaxation exercise.
      3. Talk to someone about it.
    4. Act our your best choice.

    Dealing with Your Anger

    1. Stop and count to 10.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Tell the person in words why you are angry.
      2. Walk away for now.
      3. Do a relaxation exercise.
    3. Act out your best choice.

    Responding to Teasing

    1. Stop and count to five or more.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Ignore the teasing.
      2. Say how you feel. "I feel _______ when ______."
      3. Give a reason for the person to stop.
    3. Act out your best choice.

    Asking a Question

    1. Decide what you need to ask.
    2. Decide whom you will ask.
    3. Decide what to say.
    4. Choose a good time.
    5. Ask your question. . .and make sure and say thank you afterwards.

    Asking for Help

    1. Ask yourself, "Can I do this alone?"
    2. If not, raise your hand, or find someone to ask!
    3. Wait. Say to yourself, "I know I can wait without talking" if the person is busy. Stay patient.
    4. Ask for help in a friendly way.
    5. Make sure and say thank you afterwards!

    Rewarding Yourself

    1. Decide if you did a good job.
    2. Say to yourself, "I did a good job!"
    3. Decide how else you may reward yourself.
    4. Do it.

    Deciding What Caused a Problem

    1. Decide what the problem is.
    2. Decide whom to tell.
    3. Choose a good time and place.
    4. Tell the person your problem in a friendly way.

    Being Honest

    1. Decide what might happen if you are honest.
    2. Decide what might happen if you aren't honest.
    3. Think of how to say what you have to say.
    4. Say it.
    5. Say to yourself, "Good for me. I told the truth."

    Setting a Goal

    1. Decide on a goal you want to reach.
    2. Decide on the steps you will need to take to get there.
    3. Take the first step.
    4. Take all the other steps, one at a time!
    5. Reward yourself when your goal is reached.

    Knowing Your Feelings

    1. Think about how your body feels.
    2. Decide what you could call the feeling.
    3. Say to yourself, "I feel ______."

    Making A Decision

    1. Think about the problem.
    2. Decide on your choices.
    3. Think of the possible consequences of each choice.
    4. Make the best choice.

    Wanting Something that Isn't Yours

    1. Say to yourself, "I want this, but I can't just take it!"
    2. Say "It belongs to _____________."
    3. Think about your choices:
      1. I could ask to borrow it.
      2. I could earn the money to buy it.
      3. I could ask the person to trade or play with it.
      4. I could do something else I enjoy doing.
    4. Act our your best choice.
    5. Say "Good for me. I didn't take it."

    Problem Solving

    1. Stop and say, "I have to calm down."
    2. Decide what the problem is.
    3. Think about different ways to solve the problem.
    4. Choose one way.
    5. Do it.
    6. Ask yourself, "How did this work?" If it did not work, try another solution.

    Dealing with Group Pressure

    1. Listen to what the others want you to do.
    2. Think about what might happen.
    3. Decide what you want to do.
    4. If you decide not to go along with the group, say to them, "No, I can't because _______ (give your reason)."
    5. Suggest something else to do.

    Avoiding Trouble

    1. Stop and think about what the consequences of an action might be.
    2. Decide if you want to stay out of trouble.
    3. Decide what to tell the other person.
    4. Tell the person in a firm yet friendly way.

    Suggesting an Activity

    1. Decide on an activity you want to suggest.
    2. Decide what to say.
    3. Choose a good time.
    4. Say it in a friendly way.

    Expressing Your Feelings

    1. Stop and think about how your body feels.
    2. Decide what to call the feeling.
    3. Think about your choices:
      1. Say to the person, "I feel _______."
      2. Walk away for now.
      3. Get involved in another activity.
    4. Act our your best choice.

    Showing Understanding of Another's Feelings

    1. Name what you think the person is feeling.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Ask the person if he/she feels this way.
      2. Ask the person if you can help.
      3. Leave the person alone.
    3. Act out your best choice.

    Dealing with Being Left Out

    1. Decide what has happened to cause you to feel left out.
    2. Think about your choices:
      1. Ask to join in.
      2. Choose someone else to play with.
      3. Do an activity you enjoy.
    3. Act out your best choice.

    Please let us know if you have any further questions
    about the skills that we teach each month!